So my lovely hubby and I have been together since 1999 and married since 2003. I am 29, he is 32. We had a lovely wedding with 400 (not a typo) of our (mostly his) closest family members. It was one of the best days of my life and I have so many great memories.
We have now been TTC since 2008 when I went off birth control. It was time. This was it. I’ve spent my whole reproductive life praying I WOULDN’T get pregnant, but now I wanted it. So, off the pills and BAM!! We get pregnant now! Right! Right? Uh…right??? Not so fast….
The first few months we were just casual – trying to have regular sex sorta kinda keeping track of my cycles, nothing major. Cuz hey, when you “just relax” you get preggo. Nope. 9 months goes by and we are no closer. My cycles are irregular (sometimes skipping one altogether). We finally go to my gyn for a checkup and she orders an SA (semen analysis) and an HSG for me. Well, the SA comes back with less than stellar results – very low count and low motility. The gyn calls and tells me we have virtually no chance of conceiving on our own and refers us to an RE. We were crushed!
After that we had a tumultuous couple of months – disappointment, anger, anxiety, sadness. It literally almost ripped us apart. We took a break for a couple of months and just this past August 2009 starting trying again.
We have now been to a consult with an RE and I had an HSG (which is one of the most painful procedures I’ve ever had done). DH also had a second SA.
At our first appt with the RE the day before Thanksgiving, and after a 70 (!!!) day cycle, I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). Because I was on BCP for so many years, I never knew I had irregular cycles and so was never diagnosed. Basically, this PCOS thing means I don’t ovulate on my own – pretty much ever. And no ovulation means no preggo. It does explain the excess hair and acne I’ve always had. It also apparently puts me at a higher risk of diabetes (which runs in my family) and heart disease (also in the family). Talk about bad genes. I take such good care of myself too – I’m thin and active. I exercise, I eat right (though I do have a weakness for cake). The good thing I guess is that these good habits have kept me healthier than I normally would be in combination with PCOS.
I really thought having a baby would be easy. That it would just “happen.” Not so much. I know I am lucky to at least have a direction and a really good set of doctors, but I tell you, this can be very discouraging. I hope and pray that some day we will have our own little bean.
So what you will read here is the story of our journey, which is really just beginning. And I hope ending with a beautiful and healthy baby!